Tuesday, May 27, 2003

Coincidence.. I think not

Earlier I sent around this Dilbert to some people I work with to mock the 2 hour torture some staff meetings we have in my group. We just got an email canceling our next staff meeting. I fear the message here may be that passive aggressive activity works.

Tuesday, May 13, 2003

The Matrix

This is an approximation of email chain at work today -

S: There is a meeting about creating a web project plan template to be used on all projects going forward in order to be compliant with the new process initiative. I think you should go as you know the most about what we actually need to get done these projects.

Me: New process initiative? What is wrong with the old process that we’ve been using and most people are happy with?

S: The process auditors don’t like it because there are too many different documents, they can’t figure out what is going on. (editors note: the new process has MORE documents!)

Me: Process auditors? Well, when is this new process supossed to start? There are 4 or 5 projects going on with the old process. If the old process isn’t compliant, why did C spend an entire year coming up with it and documenting it? What was he doing?

S: All projects started this year are supossed to use the new process. Hasn’t C mentioned this to you? He tried to map the old process to the new process, but apparantly it was too hard for him.

Me: This is the first I’ve heard of this. So it was too hard for C to map the processes, so he just didn’t mention to ANYONE there is a new process in town? How did he think people were going to find out this? Does he know none of our projects are using it (whatever it is)? Who else is in this meeting to discuss the project plan template?

S: C is just taking the path of least resistance, as always. You know that new consultant, T? T is driving the documentation of the new process.

Me: So when no projects are compliant with the new process that no one is aware of, T, the consultant, will be blamed?

S: haha.. of course. You are like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix when he wakes up and realizes how everything really is.

Me: I knew I didn’t like that movie for a reason.