MIA

My work computer is the oldest, slowest piece of crap allowed by law (yup, the same one with the defective hard drive). I swear. I think I may take up knitting during the time it takes some files to open. My boss claims he has no money in the budget to replace it (due to some of my dufus officemates who had their laptops stolen - which even though we have insurance for somehow doesn’t get applied back to our budget or so he claims. But that is a post for another day). One day I received an email from the big IT department in the sky saying it was time to replace my computer as part of their “you’re computer is so old and out of warranty that we refuse to support it anymore, so we will replace it from our budget” plan. Yippee!

About a week later, the computer arrives. Yippee! Except that I have to wait for the big IT department in the sky to come and image the computer. Basically, this means they load the standard software on and in the process I lose all the software that I use everyday as my department uses a “non-standard” image which drives the IT people crazy.

Days go by. Nothing happens. I’ve had the box under my desk for a week when someone from IT calls me to ask if I’ve received the computer and tells me that another IT person will call me to set up an appointment for imaging. He can’t set up the appointment because he is in a different department (the “calling to see if a package arrived” dept., I guess. Part of the “benefit” of working for a large company is there is a dept. for everything, none of which acutally bother to communicate to the rest).

Days go by. Nothing happens. One day an IT guy (the one from the butt crack incident) walks by my desk and says: is that a new computer? You need to have that imaged. Me: ya think? He proceeds to get a cart, load up my computer and tell me he will take it to his lab where he will image it and bring it back. It’s easier that way, you know. Me: whatever.

That was about a week and a half ago and I’ve not seen or heard from the IT guy since. I called him yesterday and his voicemail said he was going to be out Tues. and Weds. Since it was Thurs. I thought he would call me back. No. So I called him again today and now his message has changed to say he will be out until next Weds.

What are the chances that this guy is out selling computers on the street that he has wheeled away from unsuspecting people like myself??
I am never getting a new computer and when this one dies (and it will), I will refuse to work.

Actual Email..

I sent to someone at work today:

you could have finished this in the time you have spent explaining why you’re too busy to do this.